Wiggy Pills

Whew... these pills are making me all wonky. The first night I took one, it was only a half pill. It gave me a really bad stomach ache. The next day I was a little out of sorts, a wee bit nauseas and a wee bit dizzy. I took a super long nap.

Last night was my first time taking a full pill. I didn't feel too bad, which was good. But when I woke up at 2am to go pee (hey, gotta love waking up several times a night to pee, even if you didn't drink anything for hours before bed), I was definitely very very dizzy and very tired. yeah, I had just woke up, but still. I'm still kind of dizzy feeling. It's like a mix between being really sick, being mildly drunk and smoking a bowl. (Not that I know what that is like... :D) It's like being very close to the surface of your body, or being slightly out of body, or being aware that your body is something you are wearing. I can't wait until naptime so I can lay down.

Caayn is going to housing to ask for a fence. Maybe then Achilles can be outside. I'm afraid to leave him out there for extended periods of time. He now totally freaks out whenever that puppy is out in its backyard. He just barks and barks, and his hackles are all raised... I hope to all things divine that it never gets out (or the adult pit, because I've been watching it "play" with the other dogs, and THAT would be my worst nightmare)... I think if it did, Achilles would initiate the fight. He was hurt and he remembers who did it. Still debating on what we should do. The woman and her husband obviously aren't worried, which they should be. Caayn's hand is doing better. It doesn't look real bad because it is puncture wounds, but it does hurt him.

We bought Sully a bunkbed. It's super cool! The ladder is detachable and the bottom bunk is a full, so he'll have lots of room. We keep telling him he is going to have his own big bed, but I don't think he really understands. And for that matter, the whole time we were choosing a bed, I kept thinking of those parents. The ones who let their child pick things out so that the kid feels involved in the process. We didn't do that. We looked at our choices, and picked the one that we thought would do the best job. Are we "bad" parents for doing that? I don't remember ever being given the choice on things like that. Heck, we didn't even let him choose which big boy underwear he was getting. Not that he would have known who some guy named Superman was anyway. Whatever. The bed gets here on Friday. Now we're trying to decide if we want to set the whole bunkbed up or just use the bottom half for now (they are detachable and can be seperate beds if you want to use them that way). Without the top bunk, Sully would be able to jump on his very own bed... I love when he jumps on things. He gets so giggly and excited. I don't know why more parents don't allow it.

Anyway, all this white space and letters is getting to my eyes and making me more wiggy... so I am going to stop here. But I just needed to post... I have hardly even been keeping up on my blog list and think I've only left one or two comments since last week. Oops.

Up For a Fight?

It's only 2pm and we've already had a crazy day.

Outside its like 70 something, really nice. Achilles was out on his chain thingy (we don't have a fence yet, still want one!) enjoying the weather and the people and being outside. One of our neighbors has a husky, which is his favorite big dog breed. They also got a puppy a few months back; I've been trying to figure out what breed, I was guessing mastiff, but it hasn't grown fast enough. Just found out that it was a pit bull. And they also seemed to have acquired a fully grown pit, but I don't know if its theirs or someone else's.

(Let me preface this by saying I love pit bulls. I don't think it is the dog, I think it is who is raising it. I believe this because I had a pit bull growing up, and she was the sweetest thing you would ever have met. She had a "lovey" blanket that she dragged with her everywhere and nursed on...)

So the dogs get out and come over to our yard. The lady catches her husky and comes to get the puppy. (Oh, the puppy is probably around 6 months old, maybe up to 8?) Caayn goes to get Achilles in when chaos erupts. The pit is all over Achilles, Achilles is all over him. Caayn has Achilles by the collar trying to get him in the house, he gets out of his collar. It took me a few minutes to realize what was going on and that the woman was NOT going to help get her dog off mine. I did the one thing you aren't supposed to do during a dog fight. I grabbed the dog by his collar, grabbed a handful of skin near his hips and took him out of our yard to the woman. She was apologizing and saying the dog isn't normally like that, yada yada...

Achilles is hurt, something is wrong with one paw. We can't tell what since there appears to be no broken skin, but he holds it up and limps very very badly. He also has a bite on his upper chest, below the throat.

Caayn is also hurt. He has two marks on the top of one hand from Achilles, and two on his palm that are from the pit bull, plus a random bite on his finger. He said he had his hand in there because he didn't want the pit bull's jaws to lock on any part of Achilles. (Also something you should never do during a dog fight!!) I'm completely shaken up, I swear I have a gallon of adrenaline pumping through my body, and my hands are now super swollen.

I'm not sure what to do about this. On one hand, I am very very pissed off. We don't know who started the fight, but the dog was the one who was loose and in our yard (before the fight started, it was actually up near our door on our patio). Their dogs have been loose on many occasions. This is NOT good. She and her husband need to do their part to make sure their fences are secure, as well as all doors to get out (Caayn said they came around the front of their house, so he isn't sure they got out through the fence, but their fence is pretty unstable for large dogs, with lots of gaps). Not to mention now her dog has bitten my husband and my dog. If Artemis had been out there, I don't really want to know what would have happened. She is the kind of dog who runs up to other dogs barking as loudly as she can. She could have gotten VERY badly hurt. What if SULLY had been out there when this happened? You see where I'm going? And all she did was stand there watching her dog. Not smart. I am heavily considering going to housing and explaining the situation. I want a fence. I want their fence to be more secure. I want to know this is not going to happen again. (The people who just moved in next door to them, sort of in between our two backyards, have a little dog that might be an American Eskimo too. I felt bad for that lady because she came out to see what the ruckus was and I'm sure she will be terrified to let her little dog out!)

But on the other hand, I do understand... Maybe the dogs got out the front door and bolted. After catching the husky maybe she didn't know what to do. Dog fights are very intense and very fast. It's very difficult to grasp the situation and to move quickly. (My first thought was to grab a hose and spray them--that was what I was taught to do. Which is all and well except our backyard doesn't have a faucet and thus, no hose in our yard...) And like Caayn is saying, this is the first time its happened. It may never happen again.

Still... So I don't know. I hope the owners come by the house to check up. I would like to show them the bleeding wound on my dog's chest. (Ain't it pure luck that we were just at the vet and got some pain meds for dogs?) And if she doesn't, I do plan on going over there. It is never ever acceptable for your dog to be out of your control and bite someone. Never. Artemis may be a terror around other people, but I know she won't bite. But at the same time, I never allow her to be in a situation where she could possibly have a chance to do that. It's just common sense.

Goodness. And in case anyone ever needs this, here are some helpful steps for breaking up a dog fight. Although, to be honest, if these are going to work, you have to drill them into your brain so that it is an instinctual action. I wish no one had to be in this situation. It is no fun at all. No fun.
----------------------

Breaking up a dogfight can be dangerous. Depending on your size and abilities, choose from the following options.

Step One

Avoid hitting the dogs or getting your hands anywhere near their mouths. Hitting could make the situation worse and could cause the attack to be redirected toward you.

Step Two

Enlist another person and separate the dogs by grabbing their hind legs and walking them backward (like wheelbarrows). Secure the dogs away from each other before releasing them.

Step Three

Spray the aggressor with a water hose or, if necessary, a fire extinguisher. If this doesn't make a difference, aim for the nostrils.

Step Four

Hold a broom between dogs to separate them.

Step Five

Use a noise-making device such as an air horn to drive them apart.

Tips & Warnings

• Some dogs behave differently than others when in a fight. Dogs that were bred for fighting, such as pit bulls or rottweilers, may not be easily distracted and require stronger intervention techniques. With male dogs, for example, you may need to grab the testicles to get their attention.
• Be extremely cautious. Do not place yourself between the fighting dogs.

28 Weeks Today

Midwife appointment was good. She didn't really understand my lack of appetite thing--basically said that lots of women get full more quickly or that smells are a turn off... neither of which are my problem. I don't want to eat. I don't have ANY appetite at all. Yesterday I ate twice. That was it. Oh well. Gained 4 lbs. (In two weeks... Looks like this pregnancy will follow Sully's, where I gain most of my weight in the end.) Took my GD test, had the orange drink not fruit punch, but it was okay.

And! And I talked to her about my worry about postpartum depression. With my family history of depression, my own personal history of depression, and the severity I had it last time, I feel the odds are really stacked against me in having PPD return this time. So I have Zoloft. And you know what? When I first mentioned it, she asked what I had taken before and when I said nothing, she gave me a funny look. I don't understand. Is it really that uncommon for people who suffer from depression not to take pills? This is something I have struggled with for a long time. To -finally- break down and decide to get on a medication was a big deal. My family, we aren't really big on medicating. (Honestly, I can't remember anyone being on anything, other than my grandma and grandpa, and I'm pretty sure my grandma only started taking stuff recently.) I don't like the idea of taking something to alter my moods/chemicals. Heck, it is a struggle to get me to take plain old Tylenol. And to top it off, the midwife had to really go over everything. As if I haven't spent a lot of time researching this and weighing the information. I don't like being uninformed, lol. So yep. This is going to be me on drugs. Have I said I am excited? If not, I am. Kind of weird, I know, but I've been doing the depression thing on and off since around 14? A long time. I'm so done with it.

On the other hand (its a small hand, I promise), this means I won't be getting back on birth control. There's no way I will willingly be on multiple medications. Not unless I have to. So I may get back into the whole tracking thing, although I'm not sure how reliable it would be with a newborn in the house and hopefully breastfeeding and such... And Caayn might be getting a vasectomy. Well, that's the plan for the sometime soon future. Maybe I'll check out the IUDs. I've heard some really good things about the Mirena. I dunno, I still have time to think about all this.

I'll leave you on a silly note. Caayn popped in a Tonic cd earlier while we were driving. The first time I heard it, we were still living in a room at my aunt and uncle's house... it was around the time we got married/moved out here. I like them a lot. There's a song, number 11 to be exact, which I love love love. No clue why, it just resonates in me. I'd tell you the name of the song... or even the title of the cd... but I don't know either of those. But its a super good song! Just so ya know.

Catch Up!

So much to write about!

Monday was a super fun day. Caayn's squadron had a picnic, except it was drizzly so it was held inside some sort of structure. Nothing says picnic like concrete floors, warehouse like buildings, and military missiley type equipment. :D But they did have a bouncy castle. Sully was utterly in heaven. He bounced the whole time we were there. After an hour he started saying he was going to space, which was totally cute.

Later that afternoon was dog swimming at the base pool. It's closed for the season now, so they opened it for a few hours on Monday for dogs to swim. OMG. That was fun. Achilles didn't really know what to think of the water. He did, however, spend a good deal of time outracing all the other dogs around the pool. The downside was that he tore pads on 3 of his feet and was in very bad pain. Sigh. I do have pictures, will upload later...

Vet said that there is nothing I can do to prevent these sort of tears (he ends up sloughing off the callus part of his pads) and that there isn't anything I can do to toughen up his pads. YUCK. She said I could try booties... but I think, being a greyhound, that the booties would mess with his running chi. So I don't know. We might try old Sully socks first, see if that makes any difference. I also got some pain meds to have on hand in case this happens again. Monday night and all of Tuesday he was in so much pain that he only went out to do his business twice and spent the rest of his time on our bed. (He also ate his dinner upstairs, lol, but that was me sparing him the pain of having to go up and down the stairs again.) Poor guy. I felt so guilty... It's not like he could make the connection of why his feet were hurting so badly.

Caayn has tomorrow off... UTE Day, which is a family day they get once a month. :) I also have an appt with my midwife tomorrow. PLUS my GD test. Yipee! Syrupy, sickly sweet, fruit punch
here I come! Oh, and blood drawing... Luckily my midwife rocks. I've only had blood drawn once so far, unlike pregnancy with an OB, where I had blood drawn at nearly every appt.

My belly is getting huge. It's nearly 10 inches bigger around than it was pre-pregnancy, lol. Sometimes I feel ready to pop. Yesterday, even the vet saw Mr. L kicking my belly through my shirt... He never really lets up, but I don't mind. He's always VERY down low. I feel his hands just barely above my pubic bone. Unfortunately I've also lost my appetite. I think its from my belly being stretched so big and being full of baby. It's hard to make myself eat enough. Then again, even when I'm not pregnant I go through phases of not wanting to eat, so I dunno.

Here's me at 26 weeks....


Although I'll be 28 weeks tomorrow.

Hands are starting to get a bit swollen-they feel really thick and stiff. Oh, here's a funny thing many people don't realize. Pregnant women get bigger thighs. Not in the super fat way or anything, but in a different way. I'm not sure I have the right words to explain what I mean. But they are bigger and more powerful like. To me, those thighs mean birthing. I had them with Sully too, and its just a really nifty thing about pregnancy. I'm not sure if they look the same to people outside of the pregnancy, it might just be something the mom sees herself... I'll have to ask Caayn if he sees what I see.

Before I forget... I had a really funny dream the other day. I don't remember too much of it anymore, but it involved me having Aslan (not sure that is spelled right) from Chronicles of Narnia as a pet... and that I had given birth to some puppies and kittens (the kittens were weird looking--bright orange with thick brown stripes, lol)... And before all this I had a dream that I was copiously leaking milk everywhere and that I didn't have any breast pads. (Ya know, its strange--I seem to not wear clothes in a lot of my dreams, even if everyone else is clothed. I'm not embarrassed and no one ever says anything. It's weird!) So apparently the pregnancy is finally catching up to me in dreamland. My dreams are always so slow to catch up to reality!

One last thing. We bought Sully some big boy underwear. Those boxer brief kind? OMG--he looks so darn cute! He was running around in a white shirt, navy blue undies and black socks. He looked like a miniature old man. I loved it! Now, to figure out how to get him to sit on the potty BEFORE he goes, rather than after, lol. We're taking this really slow because I'm not sure how ready he is. He knows when he has to go, likes a clean diaper now, but I've yet to get him to take his pants off by himself. Plus he is drinking like a full cup of water throughout the night (he takes after me, I'm always super thirsty at night). So I dunno. We'll get there when we get there. Having two in diapers is hardly a fear for me, big kid diapers are way easier to deal with then wee tiny ones. Especially taking things like umbilical cords and frequent clothing changes that go along with diaper explosions... :D I'm excited about this baby. Although, I do wonder if I'll go insane. Two kids and a mom stuck in a house with no where to go, nothing to do more days than not. Yikes!

Yipee!

Thought I'd post a quick update... Caayn got a phone call a few hours ago. He made staff! And he has a low "number", which supposedly means he will get to actually sew on soon. He's thinking probably some time in January. Kind of sucks, because there is a possibility of him being in ALS (airman leadership school, I think that stands for) in November. So we'll have to hope that it doesn't fall anytime close to the birth, because we plan on him taking all of his leave then and staying home for like a month.

But YIPEE!!! I'm so so so so excited for him!!

Take a Break

Finally some nice weather! Temps are in the 70s this week, supposedly, which is just fine by me. Back home, year round temps are between 50-70ish, with our higher months seeming to land in September/October. Silly, huh?

We've been trying to take advantage of it by being outside more. Yesterday we took Sully to the big park down the road. He had his first experience with a seesaw (growing up, I always called it a teeter-totter, Caayn gave me a funny look for saying that, lol) and he LOVED it. Well, with a little less enthusiam. It was more like, "Sully, are you having fun?" "Yes." Hahaha.

Pregnancy is chugging along. Getting more excited as we go. Less than 3 months now! The baby still has no place to sleep, or well, anything really. We're going to have to hit up the Airman's Attic to see what they have, since we're on a fairly tight budget right now. And we're now considering a bunk bed set up for Sully (we'd take the ladder off, obviously), since by the time this kiddo is ready for a big bed, Sully would be plenty big enough for the top bunk.

Caayn should be finding out if he made staff today. Or tomorrow. Keep your appendages crossed! This would be a good thing, $400 raise aside. I'm really excited about this, lol.

Minor nonsense: So I hate our cable company. They are the only provider in the area, and they are always raising their prices. (Literally. I think there is a price increase at least every 3 months.) We're now paying $57 for digital cable, in which the vast majority of 'extra' channels are repeats of one available through basic cable (and if you go to the digital cable channel for a repeat station, they won't let you view it, you have to use the basic cable channel). One of the perks was the NFL channel. Last year, they refused to show NFL games on the NFL channel, because of the price (something about NFL Network raising prices, I think). LAME. This year? They decided they would remove the NFL channel and require you to pay extra money to have it. WTF? So now the only reason we're paying like $20 extra bucks for the digital cable is so that Sully can have Noggin. Which he hardly ever sees anymore. (But honestly, Noggin is MUCH better than Nick Jr or Disney Playhouse, in regards to commercials, shows, etc.) Man, I can't WAIT to move somewhere else... better cable company! At this point, I'm thinking about looking into Dish Network, even though I despise satellite tv.

Thanks Liana

"It was a lie, of course, that it wouldn't hurt a bit. But since adults always said it when it was going to hurt, he could count on that statement as an accurate prediction of the future. Sometimes lies were more dependable than the truth."
--Ender's Game, Orson Scott Card

When I was younger, I wanted to be a writer. That was my dream in life. All my old notebooks from high school are filled with character personas, names, lists, starts of stories, ideas... I played loads of PBeM RPGs (play by email roleplaying groups), particularly for the world of Pern, by Anne McCaffrey. At one point I was in 12 groups, with over 60 active characters that I wrote for. It was insanity keeping up with the amount of email I received, but it was thrilling. One group published stories occasionally, so I do have two or three stories bound, which is kind of cool in a geeky way.

In one of the groups, I met a brilliant young girl who was a year younger than me. We commiserated together when we weren't allowed in certain groups for our age (which was indeed highly irritating). After awhile, we had a lot of characters that were connected somehow. She was a genius. Literally. She taught me some of the joy of Sailor Moon (hehe), I learned about some very good anime from her. And she shared Ender with me. The book pulls you in instantly. That quote is from the beginning of the book and it really makes you think. I've used that as my favorite quote for a long time. Sometimes lies are more dependable than the truth. There's a lot of truth there.

Anyway, don't really have much else to say right now... having some braxton hicks, so I just want to go lay down with a big cup of water, but I wanted to share this first.

If you haven't read Ender's Game, I would suggest it. It's a brilliant little book.

Leading to Bob and Tom

When I was younger, I lived pretty far from my high school. Technically, I should have gone to a different one, considering I lived about 5 blocks from one. But that was the scary school. All the tough gangsters went there, and I always heard rumors that there were only like 10 white kids there and that they were just as scary as the gangsters. Not to mention my step-mom worked at that one...

So, all that aside, I went to the other high school. All my friends were there, mostly because I had lived with my grandma for years and had attended school in that part of the district. My mom drove me to school every morning. I have to admit, my mom is down with rock music, although she has a wide range of taste in music and will give anything a try. We listened to all my punk cds (and she totally sang along to things like Bad Religion and Screeching Weasel, haha). She never cared.

Needless to say, my preferred station was The Rock 107.3. They played Bob and Tom in the morning. I used to HATE that. In the morning, I wanted to wake up. No, scratch that. I needed to wake up; I had a lot of bad habits back then. I went to bed around 4am... so we'd always stop at 7-11 so I could get a big coffee and a pack of some sort of pills (I no longer remember what they were, but I know a teenager shouldn't have been taking them) to help me be awake for class. So then we'd listen to Bob and Tom. Geez. It was awful. They would be so slow and boring. I never understood how my mom could listen to that.

Flash forward to the North Dakota era of my life. The first time I heard Bob and Tom, I about peed my pants. I know this is going to sound totally lame, but I totally thought Bob and Tom was a local thing, lol. Never once realized they were a national program. And now I like them. I'm sure it's partially a nostalgia thing, but it's also the fact that I am past the stage in my life where I need music all the time. I like me some silence. But if I am up early enough, I do like to listen to them. They crack me up. Back when I could wake up with Caayn in the morning and not die by midday (aka pre-pregnancy), I'd listen to them while playing WoW. Good stuffs.

So yeah. All that leading to the silly little story about Bob and Tom. Caayn hates hearing them in the morning. He says it sounds like: brrbrrbrrbrr, HAHAHAHAHAA!! which cracks me up.

On a side note: any time his work wants to stop the 12 hour shifts, FINE WITH ME! I think all 3 of us are slowly going crazy. Sully misses his daddy. I miss my best friend. Caayn misses us. I can't take Sully out in the heat because I die before we get to the park, and sitting on the cement outside is dangerous because it hurts so bad and takes me like 5 minutes to stand up so if Sully bolted into the street.... and lastly, Caayn and I miss sex. By the time we go to bed, too tired to do anything. Especially not since the whole... pregnancy related issues... lol. I think the worst part is, even if they stop the shifts on like Wednesday, he still has to work the rest of the week. UGH! Nothing like 2 solid weeks of work with no break.

slowly... goes... crazy...

P.S
The funny IM from Jimmy? Macros. His cats. Apparently there are strange phrases macro'd onto his computer that he didn't even know he had, and his cats pushed them. Discovered a second IM exactly like that one yesterday afternoon, LOL. Very very funny.

Also funny. My greyhound can run in the world's smallest circles on our bed. It is the world's most hilarious thing. He gets all wound up and starts to just run in place. The bed literally scoots across the floor. I laugh so hard I cry, my eyes can't open, it's hard to even breathe so that I can keep laughing. So darn hilarious. I need to get that videotaped, because yeah... that is definitely share-worthy.

Pictures!

Finally, pictures! I'm such a rotten procrastinator. I put off doing just about everything!

So I have pictures of my lovely new ring:


Sully just got some crayons to stand upright on the table, and really wanted me to take a picture of them, so here's a pic of that:



I also have a picture of him kissing Caayn's picture on the computer. Sometimes he'll ask me to see pictures of him, because he is missing on him, and then he'll always ask me if he can kiss it. Poor kiddo, I am just glad that Caayn has yet to be deployed. I think that would just about break the poor kids heart. Anyway, Sully:



And then a picture of the catapiller we got the other day (yes, I know I can't spell that word... I also pronounce kindegarten wrong as well as spell it wrong... those two words are linked in my head for some reason):



Also... I woke up this morning and saw this on my computer:



HEHEHE! Thanks Jimmy for the laugh. :D I'm curious as to what caused him to say ow. A cat fall on his head? I dunno. I'll have to hope I catch him on tonight and ask. Looks like he had a great time last night though! He needs it, he's been working the same 12 hour shifts as Caayn. No one should have to work for that long. YUCK. (By the way, Jimmy needs to update his blog... It's been like... 2 months? :D)

Fun Times with the Baby!

Sorry I didn't get pictures up yesterday. We had an adventure instead.

So.... about an hour and a half after I posted my entry yesterday, I started having some pretty regular contractions. I would have chalked this up as being Braxton Hicks, except I also hadn't felt the baby move at all, since I woke up. That in itself is strange. What normally takes place upon awakening is this: I wake up, roll onto my back and stretch. The baby then kicks all over the place, as if to say, "Hey thanks for clearing me some more space!" This happens every morning without fail. If I -don't- roll over and stretch after I wake up, but keep laying on my side, the baby will start pounding on my tummy, the side that is on the bed, to remind me to give him some room. But I figured the baby must be asleep still, so no big deal.

When I noticed I was having some contractions, I went and laid on the couch, on my left side like you're supposed to do. Drank some water. Put my hand on my belly and waited. No movement. Not even the little rolling or fluttering of him chilling out. Hmmm. I tried calling Caayn's work number. No answer. Called his cell, it was off. GRRR. Repeat. Same results. So I jumped on the baby forums I read regularly and asked what they thought I should do. As I figured, they all suggested calling the midwife anyway. I didn't want to because there is nothing they can do in this situation other than tell you to head down to Labor & Delivery, which I wouldn't be able to do. No car, no friends, no family... no way to get there!

Luck was with me though, because FINALLY Caayn's cell was on. I called him over and over. He said there were 6 missed calls from me, lol, and those were just the calls made while it was turned on. I, of course, start sobbing at him and become totally unintelligible. He tells me he will be home as soon as he can. So I finally call my midwife, who indeed tells me to head to L&D.... at this point I started having tiny shooting pains in my lower back with each contractions, which was even more scary.

We show up, I get strapped with monitors.... It took some hunting, but they found the heart beat. He's really quite down low, and she had trouble keeping him on there. I got to hear him have some hiccups (I for whatever reason don't ever feel them, didn't with Sully either). And it was probably 20+ minutes before I felt him moving, even when I heard him kick the monitor. I was having some regular contractions. They settled down after I'd been laying there for awhile, but start back up if I got up or moved around. They weren't too big either, but there.

After like 2 hours of monitoring, I was given the results of my urinalysis. She said there was some bacteria in there, but not enough to worry about. (Now I'm all wondering if maybe I has having a hint of a UTI or something like that?) I was told no heavy lifting, drink extra water, rest, and if I feel more contractions, my uterus is hard for an extended period of time, or no fetal movement, to come right back in.

So yeah, we didn't get home until after 6pm. But the baby is safe, and that is all that really matters. Of course, now he is back to moving just as much as normal. I still think it was really strange that I didn't feel him for so long--I always, always feel him. Even if he isn't moving, I sense him in there. It was spooky. Possibly the most frightening thing I've yet to experience during pregnancy! I told Caayn, this kid is totally going to be grounded when he gets here. Scaring his mother like that. Geez!

I totally forgot how uncomfortable those monitors are. They make any tensing in your tummy feel about 100x worse. Just a reminder to myself to do as much laboring at home as possible, to keep those bad boys offa me!

Sully was a total trooper throughout the ordeal. He (for the most part) played happily in his stroller, messing with his crayons. He's such a good kiddo! We were lucky too, because this all took place during what should have been his nap time.

So. I apologize for no pictures yesterday, but given the circumstances, I think I'm allowed. :D I'll attempt to get them up later today, when Sully is napping.

Daddy Days of Summer

Boy, Caayn working 12 hour shifts with no break is tough. Sully doesn't understand it at all. Every day around 10:40am he says, "Daddy home?" because normally Caayn comes home for lunch around 11. I have to keep saying that no, he in fact is not going to be home soon. (He's working 6am to 6pm, by the way.) With each passing day, it gets a little more difficult. Today when he woke up, he asked me for Daddy right away. Then asked if Daddy would be home soon. Then if we could go get Daddy from work. Then could we call Daddy at work (which we did, but no one answered the phone in the office and his phone is off, so we left him a message--it was sad: "Hi Daddy! Hi Daddy! Wake up Daddy! Daddy not there...")... and then, as a last resort, "See picture of Daddy?"

Can you tell Daddy is his most favorite person in all the world?

I'm okay, if I'm the only thing he has to work with... but the second his Daddy walks in the door, I'm no more interesting than a speck on the wall, and will in fact get shunned if I speak to him, lol.

I think tomorrow will be really bad. There may be Daddy meltdowns. I suspect Sully knows which days are the weekends, because he always wakes up earlier than usual.

Don't kill me or anything... but he wakes up at 9am on the weekends... and 10:30 on week days. Yeah. And he goes to bed at 8pm. Well... relatively speaking. We place him in his crib at 8, and some days he takes books and notebooks and crayons in with him and will lay awake reading or coloring. Lol. But still. I have a good sleeper. He's been like this since he was like 4 months old?

I'm thinking that I can't be this lucky twice. I bet this baby doesn't sleep for ages, lol.

Yesterday I saw something I have never seen before, in real life. A big fat green catapiller. Sully first called it a snake. But then quickly realized it wasn't, and has since been talking about his "cattypitter" which is the cutest thing ever. I took pictures, so I'll have to post some. I was gonna keep it so Sully could see the whole metamorphesis thing, but he may be too young... so we released it back into the outdoors. I wonder what type of butterfly it would have made.

After dinner the other night, we stopped in at Waldens for a new book. I go crazy without something to read, and I have literally read all my books 10+ times, if they are good. I've got a few that were so bad I only read them once... but still. So I stared at their selection... I'm totally stuck on a select bunch of authors. And I didn't see anything by them that was interesting or that I didn't already own. So I picked up Speaker for the Dead, by Orson Scott Card. Got home. I already have it. I'm missing the one after that. BOO! So I still have nothing to read. Might reread It...

Oh. And when I checked my email this morning, I definitely had a new flickr friend. A teacher lady who "has a wild sexual streak". Apparently she had her last account frozen. Hmm, I wonder why. Yeah. So THAT was a shocker.

And on a completely unrelated note... I swear I'll make my next appt soon... I just have to wait until this dumb generation thing is over. I mean, technically I could just take Caayn to work... but he has yet to miss any of my prenatal appts and I don't mean for him to start now... plus 5:30am is far too early to drag Sully out of bed, just so we could have the van. Oh, and then he'd have to come with me to my appt and be attended only by me. So we're waiting. Supposedly I have to wait until after the 10th. Which sucks. I'm pretty sure I was due for it this week. I don't like missing things. And I also need to make a car appt. Our right turn signal keeps signaling that we are actually turning left. Not a good thing. (Although, to be honest, it must not matter. I don't think people know how to work turn signals anymore...) And Caayn figured out that when it decides it is going to signal the wrong way, that half the dashboard lights kind of die. Hmm. That sounds really not good. Poor van. It also sounds expensive, lol. Plus, we're also due for an oil change. And probably a brake check, but eh... I hate not living near my family--they can always check that stuff for me and save me some money if its not needed.

Okay. enough rambling. I'll be back later with pictures. :)

Let it go!

Dinner was absolutely fabulous. I love Mexican food! I got some kind of mango margarita (I forget if it was banana or orange), no alcohol, o' course. It was much better than the raspberry, but I think thats because there was more melt/syrup at the bottom. The icy part still tasted like bathroom stall. I'm beginning to wonder if I should try another restaurant's NA margaritas, just to see if those are any better.

Okay, for anyone who isn't interested in hearing about a pregnant woman's sex life, stop reading. Or if you are family.




Stop reading here. Seriously.


Alright.


So I'm officially at the stage of pregnancy where sex is difficult. Not the positioning so much as the getting to the end. This happened last pregnancy too. I think the belly is just too big, lol. It makes me think of the saying, it's not the size of the boat it's the motion in the ocean? (Or however it goes.) Well, the belly definitely messes with the ocean! Can you imagine having sex with a beach ball in between the two of you? Difficult. And this is the last time I'm going to mention this, lol!! I will still be bothered by it, but needless to say, it's a little awkward to talk about, haha.


Pfft. I know you all read that anyway... but if you DIDN'T, you can start reading again!

I think I want to look into doing a doula thing. Throughout the last three years of my life, I have accumulated quite a bit of knowledge on pregnancy and birthing. It's something I really am fascinated by and I enjoy hearing/reading/seeing. How often do you get to see someone's actively become a goddess? They are literally creating life within themselves. Very awesome. Last pregnancy I thought it would be really really awesome to be a midwife. But my guess is that involves a LOT of school work and stuff like that, since it's a medical field. And with this pregnancy, I realized the role of the doula is really actually important too. (Last time I never really looked into it, kind of thought ugh why would you need someone when you have your _____?) It would be really awesome to be able to utilize all the bits of info that I have, and to be able to share and help women through this phase of their lives. So yeah... it's something I've got boinking around in the back of my brain to look into at some point.

And not that this is very interesting, considering the amount of times I've written about it, but Sully is, again, not pooping. Goodness. We're on day #5 now. Miralax isn't really doing much other than to give him the urge... but he actively fights it and holds it in. Drives me bonkers because I don't know what to do. He stands around screaming at the top of his lungs, shaking, his hair getting all sweaty on his forehead... but he refuses to go. I mean, seriously, if you had to go that bad, wouldn't you just do it? I try and tell him that, but hey, he's two. He thinks I don't know what I'm talking about. Poor guy.

I dreamed about my baby last night. He didn't look at all like Caayn and I have been imagining (we found out that we both have the same picture... dark hair, blue eyes--which is odd since Caayn's family all have dark brown eyes, although I have family with blue, small and petite)... he was a long baby, with sandy blonde hair, stonewashed blue eyes... And then I dreamed that the dr said something was wrong with my uterus, that I had some kind of infection possibly, and would need to take these bright red pills. Huh. Well then!

OOOH! I won an auction off ebay the other day, my first time ever really looking around and bidding on something... It's a super cute rainbow moonstone ring. I love it. My aunt has lots of rings and jewelery with large gemstones (she actually had a really nifty metaphysical store for awhile, and I think is now just selling her jewelery at bazaars and stuff like that) and she had a huge moonstone ring which I just loved. So now I've got one too! I've got to find something for my other hand now, lol.

The One About Nothing

We made it to the ceremony yesterday! I was very happy about that, despite the 102 degree temperatures outside or the fact that Sully didn't nap beforehand. It was a little rough at the beginning, Sully was yelling, "Chair!" during the national anthem because everyone was standing and he wanted Caayn to be sitting down. He did manage to crack most of the folks up though. When someone would be named to receive their new stripes, the crowd would applaud, and then members of their squadron would yell out some funny thing. Well, Sully has to yell if other people are... so they would do their thing, and then he would throw his arms up and yell something too. People laughed. Silly kid.

I like attending functions. Not sure why, since I'm generally an anti-social person and I don't really like making small talk... I think maybe its because I like to watch people. They're funny. Plus, I recognized a whole ton of the people there from when I worked at the gym (I doubt any of them remembered me, lol).

Today is our anniversary! This day, 4 years ago, at 7:30pmish CA time, we and my dearest family members huddled in the cave overlooking Pirates' Cove near Port San Luis and said some things. It was a very great day. Caayn also got a memorable big surprise that day, haha! Even though he wasn't supposed to get a lunch today because they are doing a generation (which I still don't know what that means, other than 12 hour days and no lunch breaks to come home), he totally surprised me and Sully by showing up with some roses and lilies. It was exciting!

Oh, and yesterday? I baked a yellow cake. With chocolate frosting. YUM.

sorry for such boring posts lately. I'm desperately trying not to blog about pregnancy related things, because I'm sure its not very interesting to most. But its a very all-encompassing thing for me. Plus, I don't really do much around here.

Sully got a super cool jacket from Delaware yesterday. I can't wait for it to be cold so he can wear it! He also got The Poky Little Puppy and another book. He's been talking about it all day, and it comes out really cute. And we are actually thinking about giving him a hair cut. He has really long hair that curls wildly about his head. I LOOOOOVE it. But Caayn is getting really tired of every single person calling him a girl. (Which I have to say is totally dumb, because his face looks like a little boy and we definitely dress him in little boy clothes.) And I hate that excuse anyway, since most little boys I see these days have just as long of hair as girls, even on teenagers. You don't see adults walking up to a 17 yr old boy with shoulder length hair and saying, "Excuse me, miss?" So yeah... we're considering it. I don't want to, mostly because I worry that those curls won't come back. They didn't come back on me until I was like 13, and I blame that on both puberty and the ocean air, since my hair has yet to show even a hint of a wave out here, and neither of which Sully has. Boo. I bet he'd be pretty cute though with a little boy cut.