I post on a baby forum, a site called BabyCenter... have for a long time. It's kind of nice talking with other women whose babies are the same age as yours (even though I don't visit my March board very often anymore). Several of the bloggers I read are other March mommies. So I went there today and posted a question. Will stress prevent me from labor stuff? (Details: I was contracting really good last night, slowly getting closer together, more intense too, when Sully came and got in bed with us. Then he started messing around and getting louder and then started shrieking about I don't know what. All contractions stopped. I didn't get them again until this afternoon, when again a meltdown by him caused them to stop.) And I also vented on how worried I am about the whole labor thing and hospital thing since we have no one to watch Sully. And I got some nasty responses. I had to take several deep breaths after I read this one.
" You're beyond 38 weeks and you haven't made arrangements for your older child yet?!?!
I hit my third trimester and immediately lined up 5 people to watch my daughter until my MIL could get here from her home, 3 hours west of here.
You need to start calling EVERYONE you know, starting with the ones who already have child rearing experience. Knock on the doors of your nice neighbors and ask them. Explain that you're in a bind and need their help. Go to sitter city.com and FIND ONE. You might have to pay through the nose, but poor planning will do that to you.
Seriously, not to scold you like a little kid, but why the heck didn't you and DH figure this out months, or at least, weeks ago? You've been pregnant a while, so it's not like this is a total out of the blue surprise. And this is not something you should be winging. If all else fails, or maybe to relieve some stress that it might, call your L&D department and FIND OUT POLICY.
If no one can watch your eldest, then DH is gonna have to miss the birth. Your bad and his. Consequences happen, but you can't just leave your kid in the waiting room on his own. The nurses would have CPS on the phone in 2 minutes flat.
If this seems harsh, it's because I have NO patience for people who procrastinate. And yes, I am this blunt with everyone."
Seriously, how offense is that? Aside from being a little ticked that she ignored my main question, I was really upset that she jumped on this whole thing as if I were a dumbass and was totally just going to wing this whole birth thing. It's not like we planned ALL the crazy things that have come pouring down the past few months. Life happens, and sometimes you just have to roll with it. Like for instance, I have been preparing myself mentally for Caayn NOT to be there for the birth. That way, if he is, it's a happy surprise, but if not, I don't freak out and have a meltdown myself. And we have plans to entertain Sully. We bought loads of new art supplies, we'd going to bring Caayn's laptop with some dvds... In general, he should be okay.
But ugh. I swear, pregnant women and sometimes just moms in general, can turn on each other quicker than you can say boo. It's sad. For the most part, thats why I avoid friendships with girls to begin with. I just always expect this kind of crap to go down. Geez.
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